The Call for Embracing Masculine Vulnerability
ATTENTION MEN & BOYS...and anyone who is a mother, sister, wife, friend or partner of a man. WE MUST URGENTLY RETHINK MASCULINITY.
Listen to this interview the next time you have a 30 minute drive or time to cue up this video.
This interview spoke to me. There are so many men that I have observed throughout my life, who struggle with vulnerability...with speaking their truth...or expressing themselves and communicating their feelings in a loving, healthy way. I want more for them! There is nothing sexier or more attractive than a man/partner who can confidently ebb and flow between vulnerable communication and strong, masculine protector. Some of the strongest connection building moments in my marriage have been when my hockey playing, hunting, bulging biceps, manly man of a hot husband has lain down his Shield to honestly and vulnerably communication with me. He doesn’t live there, but he goes there when it’s needed and it’s amazing. Not only has this been an integral part of growing our marriage, but it’s an incredible example for our son.
Vulnerability in a man (or anyone!) is not weakness my friends, but rather the most incredible example of strength, confidence and bravery. IT’S SO INCREDIBLY ATTRACTIVE 🔥🔥🔥 We need more men to model the way here and show that you CAN communicate your frustrations, disappointments and anger in a calm, loving way, rather than through yelling, condescension, violence, abuse, isolation or any of the other countless vices/outlets people turn to, to avoid feeling their feelings.
On the flip side, let our commitment be to create a safe space for these men to BE vulnerable so that when they do take the leap of faith to open up, share and show this “other” side of themselves that has typically lived in the shadows or under a rock...they are encouraged, heard and their efforts are acknowledged...even celebrated!
For years I have said that teaching our children CONFIDENCE (and even reteaching ourselves as adults) and giving them the tools to embrace and BE exactly who they are, not who society or friends or family try to tell them they should be,... is the single most important skill we can provide. Much of my work is centered around reestablishing confidence and forming new thought patterns to help people become who they really are; to embrace who they authentically long so desperately to be.
I’m so grateful to my dear friend The Drunken Medium, Bernardo Aguilar for modeling this for me from the moment we met in Mendoza, Argentina back in 2001. Writing this also made me think of my late grandfather, Forad Kelley, who encouraged me to be exactly who I am, and to express exactly how I felt and ask for everything I wanted, and to dream my big dream. Thank you for teaching me self-love and creating a safe space for vulnerable communication. There was nothing I couldn’t tell him. ❤️ Some people may say that he spoiled me, but I call it a shining example of love without conditions or limits.
May we all be so on purpose.✨🙏🏼✨